All This “No Uterus” Shaming Has Got To STOP!!

All This “No Uterus” Shaming Has Got To STOP!!

…being a man, with NO uterus, trust me on this…
-Random woman talking down to me on my Facebook page

I gotta be honest. There is nothing a pro-choicer can say that is more annoying than, “You don’t have a uterus, so you don’t get an opinion.” Or, “You’ll never be pregnant, so you don’t get to have a say.”
These comments come in many different forms, but they are all the same amount of ridiculous.

Abortion is one of the most important issues being discussed today. How can you tell someone they don’t get to have an opinion on a matter that effects ALL HUMANS moving forward in this society? And based on gender? What!?!?

Oh wait. Let’s be honest pro-choicers, it’s not actually gender that matters, is it?

Would you say having a uterus matters to…?

Let’s start at the top of the political food chain. Our current president, Barack Obama is pretty much in bed with Planned Parenthood. He supports abortion and gets to stand on stages in front of millions of people and tell us all how wonderful the abortion industry is. Why doesn’t someone shush him? He doesn’t have a uterus.

All the Supreme Court justices that ruled on Roe v. Wade, well there were no uteruses to rule on that decision. Ruh roh. Does it still count? Do we need a re-trial? (I say we need to revisit the case, but for lots of reasons)

As far as I can remember, when my wife Abby was still working at Planned Parenthood, all the doctors performing abortions were men. All but one, and she was only there to fill in for a day. They don’t have a uterus. Why do they get a pass? They’ll never get pregnant.

What about OBGYNs that are men? Does not having a uterus mean they will never fully understand how to take care of and council women? If the doctor supports abortion, that question doesn’t even remotely come up.

Pro-Choice-MensAnd then there is this guy. Regular Pro-choice Joe who supports women’s rights. (Really, just the right to abort in this case) He gets to walk tall amongst the uteruses. He is enlightened, and because he agrees with Pro-choice Jane, he gets to talk down to all us silly pro-life men that will never get pregnant. His opinion matters, even if he is nothing more than a womanizer that wants to have lots of sex and never have kids. We don’t judge him, so long as he can hold a sign at rallies. Are they all bad guys? Of course not. Some of them are being genuinely supportive. Many of them believe they are right, and I admire conviction. But still, they don’t have a uterus. How do we get around this? How does his opinion get to count without any opposition?

IT’S MADDENING!!!!!

In my not so humble opinion…

If you say my opinion doesn’t count because I don’t have a uterus yet applaud male politicians and doctors that do support abortion, you are a hypocrite. You are full of poop and just don’t like being disagreed with. Maybe you have even allowed your bitter feelings to get in the way of having rational discussions on important issues. Using the “no uterus” response is just too convenient. It’s a cowardly attempt to shut down someone that doesn’t agree with you. We all get the same information on the subject. Yes, there are men who bail on the women they get pregnant. But does that mean you get to dismiss my opinion rather than tell the womanizing cowards out there to buck up and be more responsible?

The real kicker to me is that most of the people I know that are pro-life are women. In fact, my favorite pro-lifer happens to be my wife, who I have participated in procreation with on several occasions. That’s right. I’m a man and I have played a role in the whole reproductive process. Seriously, it’s science. Look it up. Men can do that. So how ’bout we support the ones that are good, responsible dads and human beings? Thanks again, Abby, for “allowing” me to have an opinion.

 

It seems to me, if you are a human with a brain, a heart, and a conscience you should get to have an opinion. It doesn’t matter if that person is good or evil, smart or less than smart, man or woman, gay or straight, fertile or infertile, athlete or intellectual… abortion effects us all. We should all be allowed to talk about it. It’s humans talking about human life, not men telling women what to do with their bodies. You want to get a tattoo or cosmetic surgery? Go for it. You want to kill the unborn child growing inside you? Yeah, I want to talk that one through considering it involves another person’s body. I’m sticking up for both the mother and the child and I am not going to let anyone shush me because I don’t have a uterus.

A little bonus video on the issue. Suggested by a good friend, who has a uterus.

7 comments

  1. Exactly. This is a weak pro-choice argument. If we advocate for gender-neutral restrooms and people can identify as whatever gender they’d like, why is it that gender “matters” when it comes to having an opinion on abortion? As you put it – the gender of the person giving the opinion only matters when it’s pro-life and coming from a man. It takes 2 to tango. And, no, men will never understand the difficulty of being a woman or having a child, but they are allowed to have an opinion on THEIR procreation and on issues affecting life and death in the world. Not to mention – abortion kills MALES (and females, of course). But, are those without a uterus allowed to care for the unborn without a uterus? Men shouldn’t pressure women regarding their bodies, but in the case of abortion, more than just the woman’s body is involved. And in the case of procreation, it takes TWO. #newsflash #science

  2. It’s not possible for any man or woman to be uninvolved. If someone says nothing, that gives the impression that they are comfortable with the status quo.

  3. John Dies in the End

    Regardless of whether or not it take two to reproduce, that’s not the point of pro-choice people’s opinion on men in the abortion process. Who, let’s face it, is who the “people without a uterus” refers to. It isn’t that men’s opinions on abortion don’t matter, it’s that what they say shouldn’t have an influence on a woman. If a wife believes that she isn’t ready or does not want a child, and decides to go about having an abortion, her husband shouldn’t pressure her into keeping the potential child or vice versa. That’s rude and bullying. A man does not have a say on decisions a woman has for her own body. Also yes, you will never have to carry a child, and that does have some weight in this argument. A woman has to go through carrying and birthing a child and you’ll never have to do that, so what you think her of her decision is irrelevant. Because newsflash IT IS HER BODY. Not yours.

    • You really should have picked a better example than a married couple. Of course a husband and father would have a say in the life of his child. That is just the worst argument ever. Thanks for the news flash, but that is a tired old argument too. Allow me to respond with a tired old argument of my own. The baby’s body is not hers. I am not telling women why to do with their bodies. I am saying it’s not ok to kill your unborn child. Just like it’s not ok for a rapist to rape or slave owners to own another person.

    • “her husband shouldn’t pressure her into keeping the potential child or vice versa”

      That’s a moral principle that seems to be based on your moral intuition. But other people may have different moral intuitions, so some probing will be necessary to see which moral intuition is most correct. You have already heard back from Doug and have understood what his moral intuition says.

      “you will never have to carry a child, and that does have some weight in this argument.”

      You seem to mean the abortion argument in general. I agree to the extent that on the abortion issue, we men, thought it’s not possible for us to be uninvolved, should listen carefully to the views of women. I wouldn’t be surprised if Doug’s views have been shaped in part by listening to the views of his wife. My views have been shaped in part by listening to the eloquently-worded views of the wife of Ruben Navarrette.

      Writing in The Daily Beast —

      http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2015/08/10/i-don-t-know-if-i-m-pro-choice-anymore.html?via=desktop&source=email

      — Navarrette, whom one web page describes as “the most widely syndicated Hispanic columnist in the mainstream news media,” wrote about how he and his wife were disturbed by the recent Planned Parenthood videos (if you don’t listen to him, a man, listen to his wife):

      “As I’ve only realized lately, to be a man, and to declare yourself
      pro-choice, is to proclaim your neutrality. And, as I’ve only recently
      been willing to admit, even to myself, that’s another name for ‘wimping
      out.’

      “At least that’s how my wife sees it. She’s pro-life, and so she’s been
      tearing into me every time a new video is released. She’s not buying my argument that, as a man, I have to defer to women and trust them to make their own choices about what to do with
      their bodies. To her, that’s ridiculous–and cowardly.

      ” ‘You can’t stand on the sidelines, especially now that you’ve seen these
      videos,’ she told me recently. ‘That’s ********! These are babies that
      are being killed. Millions of them. And you need to use your voice to
      protect them. That’s what a man does. He protects children–his own
      children, and other children. That’s what it means to be a man.’ “

  4. Excellent post. I can add one reason. More than 50 million abortions have taken place in the U.S. since Roe v. Wade. Say the vast majority of men who helped create those circumstances were glad that the abortion happened. If only 5% of those men didn’t want that abortion to happen, though, that is still MILLIONS of men who know the pain of lost fatherhood. And as those men age, even some of the ones who were originally most glad are going to regret what they did.

    In other words, sometimes that “no uterus” is speaking from a very real, very personal pain … and you just never know.

  5. I love this, Doug. My issue with the “men have no say” problem is that it takes two. In the case of natural science, that kid wouldn’t be developing right now if it weren’t for the male. There for a male has just as much say in the protection of his DNA. there was a young man who lost twins to abortion, and he became a pro-life priest.

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