Not Ready To Make Nice.

It’s been about 12 hours since my wife told me she was approached by a man affiliated with the group AHA (Abolish Human Abortion). She said a guy came to her and started aggressively arguing with her. When she tried to walk away, he revealed that he was recording the conversation. When Abby tried to cover the camera, the guy grabbed her arm and started to yank her around. Now, this is the story I was given and that’s all I need to know. Abby, my son, and everyone else involved is safe. Abby was not upset when she told me the story, so that keeps me calm as well. I figured now that I have had some time to sleep and think about what happened, why not put a little raw honest emotion out there on the internet?

The most frustrating thing about Abby being a public figure who travels, is not being there to protect her. It has been an issue from the beginning. She has had people call for her execution, show up at her talks to be a disturbance, argue with her on FaceBook, yell at her, condemn her to Hell, and whatever else I can’t remember. The list is too long. Either way, I am pretty sure this is the first time someone actually put their hands on my wife with malicious intent.

I honestly don’t care what he was there to argue about. Abby said it had something to do with her being Catholic. He obviously wasn’t there to share the peace. As far as arguing goes, Abby is pretty good at that and can handle herself. I have no problem there. I do have a problem with him grabbing her and pulling her around right in front of my 6 week-old son. If I could turn back time and be there in the heat of the moment… I am not saying I could or would whoop his ass, but I would have done what ever it took to stop him and make sure he never touches another woman like that again. That’s not just how I feel, it’s my duty as a husband and a man. Nobody needs to read this and think I am threatening him or that I want someone to find him and hurt him. The moment has gone and everyone is fine. The time for clinching fists has passed. I do want my wife to file a restraining order, and I do want this to be handled appropriately.

At this very moment, I am in no mood to forgive or turn the other cheek. I don’t want to hear his side of the story. I especially don’t want to see what happened. If anyone from AHA tries contact me or argue with me, I am going to completely ignore them. Yes I am upset. No I am not walking around with a scowl, kicking kittens. If you want to pray for me and my family, please do. We could sure use it. I am not sure how to get closure on this one. I kind of want to hold on to this feeling for a little while. It gives me a sense of urgency to make sure Abby is taken care of. I am not feeling anger or hate. I am mostly frustrated. I am not sure what I would do if he was standing in front of me right now. I wasn’t there to protect her and my son. I wasn’t there to hug her when the moment was over. I wasn’t there to talk to the police. I will feel better when Abby and Carter get home. Maybe that’s when I can start to forgive and move on.

Here is what I hope everyone else takes from this. The worst thing about all this is that AHA is being lumped in with the rest of us pro lifers. They have a reputation for this kind of behavior. Their tactics are ineffective and do not save babies. I am not even sure they care if babies are saved and women are helped. It seems to me they only care about being right. In a movement that is moving towards a peaceful, prayerful approach, this kind of thing is very damaging to the reputation of the movement as a whole. Abortion supporters see this and assume we are all a bunch of angry, hateful nut jobs that just like to hear ourselves scream. I believe everything about AHA is based on feelings of hate. I am not sure how they got there, but please be sure you don’t follow down the same path. I understand that there are frustrations in the pro life movement. I understand there are times you just want to grab people and scream the truth at them. I understand how you can get angry and cary that anger with you. I get how hard all of that is. But we just can’t allow those feeling to take control and still be effective. If you feel that you are getting angry and starting to feel hate towards people on the other side, I would ask that you step away. Spend some time in prayer. Get some perspective. Remember why you are pro life.  Remember we are not here to prove we are right, but to save lives. As a Christian, I believe God will end abortion on his terms, not ours. It’s time to move on from the negative stereotypes.

Before I end this, I want say thanks for all the support my family has received. I especially want to thank everyone that was there to help my wife in the heat of the moment. I wasn’t there to do it, so it’s good to know I can count on good men and women to help me out. A BIG GIGANTIC thanks to Meagan for getting my son out of harms way, and A MEGA TITANIC thanks to the people that stepped in to stop the threat.

 

 

19 comments

  1. Hi Doug,

    I was two people behind Christopher in line for Abby to sign my book (which didn’t happen bc of the commotion, but I did get a pic with her 🙂
    I want Abby to know that I so appreciate her strength and courage in this situation. This young man was very irrational & very obviously trying to start a fight & get attention. Abby did her best to defend our Catholic faith in a calm matter, whereas he tried to provoke her by flaunting his Go pro in her face, which she tried to cover up (which reflexively I would have done in that situation). A few stepped in to get her away from him & he started getting very loud & disruptive.
    I seriously was tempted in line to say, “umm, are you going to get your book signed sir?” (But he clearly wasn’t there to get his book signed) I almost now wish I would have in order to disfuse the situation!!!!

    Anyway, at the time of his grabbing her wrist, I clutched my cross and miraculous medal and pleaded for God and his angels to intervene…which they promptly did, with the help of all of our prayers. It was scary to be that close to malicious hate directed at such an authentic loving compassionate person. John 1:4,5 has been on my heart ever since 🙂 the evil one will try any way he can I guess to combat our mission of love & life. But his darkness can NEVER extinguish our Lord’s light. EVER!! That always comforts me, no matter the situation.

    God bless you and your beautiful loving family!!! I told Abby afterwards that her testimony was the MOST moving thing I have heard, and I meant it! I lead a respect life group at a church in the twin cities & her testimony that night has set me on Fire with the zeal for truth and spreading the gospel of life with confidence (I have struggled with fear) and courage!!!
    Thank you for saying YES to God’s call in this mission 🙂

  2. i stay as far away from AHA as possible. They are wrong headed in many ways and only hurt the movement. And I love seeing a man get riled up in defense of his wife! Thank you for this witness and awesome post. There was one tiny part that made me uncomfortable. I think if you are going to speak publicly, you should watch the videos. Not because you don’t trust your wife, but simply as a practical matter. This is your public witness (and Abby’s). Her statement is public and the video is public. The AHA guy was annoying and inappropriate in some ways. But it certainly does appear that he was not threatening or aggressive until people entered his space. You should know that. It does matter because we all have a right to the truth and our reputations, even obnoxious AHA members. I am not saying Abby is wrong or lying. I am just encouraging you to watch as a matter of charity and respect to all involved. God bless you. I wish all husbands were as awesome.

    • I did end up watching. I was worried about getting angrier than I needed to. The video is cut and pasted, by the way. He conveniently left stuff out like shoving a woman into a table. As far as being in his space goes, that’s all on him. You can not act that aggressive and expect people to be polite. He planned that for a week. We know that because we saw it on his FB page. That’s pretty damn creepy. But what that also tells me is he was there to cause the biggest disturbance possible. He was trespassing. He was being much louder than he needed to be. He invaded Abby’s space by recording without her permission. He is also a grown ass man that doesn’t need to grad a woman who is trying to BLOCK his phone, not GRAB it. Again I say, he was there to cause a disturbance and got exactly what he was looking for. His aggression was beyond necessary. All he had to do was leave. He was not just annoying and obnoxious. He was aggressive and ranting like a lunatic. Everyone else was calm, and 100% in the right to act like they did. That guy had been ugly to Abby on FB in the past, too. As far as I am concerned, he is a threat to the safety of my family. He is basically in the beginning stages of being a stalker. Who knows how far he will take it. I watched to see how bad ass my wife is. He deserves no respect what so ever. I would encourage you to reconsider if what was in his videos was truth.

      Ps. I know this seems written in a very angry tone, but it’s not at you. It’s at him for even trying to gain any sympathy for what he did. He needs prayer and guidance. I appreciate your support, and I am not that awesome.

      • First off – I guess I am now officially “de-lurking”… I found your blog trohugh my cousin Jocelyn and Pacey (Kerry, Ruby, and Medina as well!)I love reading about your family, and I’m always thinking and praying for Abby. I love how reading your blog (and the comments) can give me happy and sad tears all at once… I am a true believer that laughter really is the best medicine there is out there. Hopefully the ice storm doesn’t get as bad as it did last year. I don’t think the hospital would send you out in the ice… you’d just end up right back there…Thinking about Abby as always…Jessica

    • OH, and please read the comment right above yours from Mary. She was there. Have a good one and stay awesome yourself!!

  3. Hitting the nail on the head there when you say they only care about being right.
    It’s quite clear this man attended an event with the sole purpose to tell Abby her religion was the wrong religion. He was not there as part of a united force against abortion, he was there to debate, discredit on film her beliefs.
    I’m not at all religious, and my only interaction with Abby has been a few online messages where she vocalises her support for the LGBT pro life community. To my mind she has proven that her goal is an end to abortion. She publicly embraces accepts and encourages people with polar opposite views to her own to join the fight against abortion.
    Someone secure in their faith and lifestyle has no reason to prove they’re right.
    I admire Abby so much for her very vocal support of the LGBT Pro Life community. AHA , however seem more concerned that people live their whole lives according to AHA’s version of right and wrong. Abortion is a horrific, brutal act of violence being sold to the masses as healthcare. Abby is one of the very few pro life leaders who doesn’t see Marriage Equality, LGBT rights and abortion as different branches of the same tree. I know, as a Carholic she probably doesn’t agree with Marriage Equality, or gay adoption etc but she has shown her heart time and time again when she encourages and welcomes people of different beliefs and different lifestyles, into the pro life movement without having to pass comment on the issues that seperate us.
    I do tend to ramble, but I’ve watched the video and it’s clear this man had religion on his mind. He wasn’t interested in the horror if abortion, he wasn’t interested encouraging people to fight harder to abolish abortion. He was there to publicly catch Abby out on her beliefs and prove her religion wrong. Because having the right religion is more important than ending abortion. So so sad.

    • I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your response. It’s nice to hear from people who get it. It doesn’t take a genius to see what that guy was up to. Thank you for supporting my wife. Ramble on, my friend!!

  4. I write this comment with one of my 2 kitties purring away at my side ;). I am very happy Abby has an excellent husband to support her!

  5. Doug, you say, “I don’t want to hear his side of the story. I especially don’t want to see what happened.” …but wouldn’t that be helpful in knowing if what your wife is saying is actually true or not? It was your wife who assaulted him…

    • Hey Jonathan…why don’t you go look at some women in tight pants, get them pregnant, hide it from everyone and then stalk them? Oh wait…you already did that. Me thinks you should focus on your own problems. In fact, you and Christopher Rush have a lot in common…you like to stalk women. Scary dudes. Maybe I should get a restraining order on you, too (just in case).

    • Thanks for quoting me back to me. I completely forgot what I said. It’s good to know you support anti-Catholic stalkers that show up to harass women. Class act all the way.

      • I am really sorry for this ictroesm!! i definitely know what it is like because i live in northern michigan and winter lasts about 6 months…and periodically we get ice storms! so i really feel for you…and you can barely go anywhere. but through all of that it really is beautiful…God makes things that seem awful to us look amazing and beautiful. He is just awesome like that i guess 🙂 i am continuing praying for Abby and all of you!!! GOD BLESS!!!!

  6. God bless you and your family Doug. As a husband and father I can empathize and understand your frustration. Good post, and I enjoy hearing your side of the story on all issues!

  7. When Abby came to NH to speak at Dartmouth, I arrived wondering if there would be protesters from either side of the abortion divide. There weren’t. Abby was wonderful, took all our questions, and was more relaxed than I ever expected. I’m sorry that every event can’t be like that. I am grateful to God for the safety of her and your son after the assault yesterday. Thank you for all you and she are doing to build a culture of life.

  8. Doug, I cannot imagine what you, Abby and your family must endure in this fight for those that cannot. I want you to know that many of us appreciate the sacrifice that the Johnson family has daily.

    We appreciate you and pray for you,
    fight the good fight.
    Rodney,
    KofC 13470

  9. My family is praying for yours, Doug. We’re very happy Abby and the baby are safe.

  10. Great perspective Doug. It was a scary unfortunate thing but I think we’ve all learned to stay the heck away from AHA. They are quite simply crazy.

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